Adulthood is a Shamrock Shake

I have come to the conclusion that adulthood is like a McDonald's Shamrock Shake.

Before you balk--hear me out.  Both are highly anticipated, long-awaited events in one's life.  You wait and you wait and you wait, and finally it's time.  Both bring the promise of a bright, sunny future.  You have made it through the bleak days of the new year and are finally rounding a corner to things really beginning.  You've seen the advertisments coming for months and finally the time for indulging arrives.

Overcome with excitement, you take your first sip.  It's everything you anticipated and more.  A rich, heavenly gulp of minty goodness.  (Ok, I'm not certain where the mint comes in on adulthood, but work with me here).  Maybe you eat the cherry first, maybe you squish it to the bottom of the cup, to be savored later.  But you certainly know it's there and it's yours.  You sigh with contentment.  This.  Is.  It.  You have arrived.  Spring has arrived.  Eagerly you take another sip.  Hmm...not quite as refreshing as the first.  But certainly better than being shake-less.  You take a pause to allow the flavor to really echo in your mouth.  Time for another sip.  Wow, now it's getting really sweet.  Well, certainly it's the fault of your taste buds, not the creamy goodness of the shake.  You drink and you drink.  And as you do, as you progress through the shake of adulthood, you get more and more...nauseous.  That's right--the tasty heaven that you craved for what seemed like years has turned on you.  You continue drinking because, hell, you paid for the stupid thing.  But as you continue, you know it's not going to get any better.  Instead, you find a way to fight through it.  You have to continue on.  You have to survive.  Finally, you reach the bottom.  And with a grateful slllllluuuuuurrrrrrppppp, you finish it off.  And you weep with joy that you're done....

....until it is time, once again, to convince yourself that it is spring.  Finding new hope, you get yourself excited all over again for the promise of heaven.  You forget the torment you endured last time, and you try once again to look forward to the spring.  And you find yourself excited.  And so, my dear readers, my advice to you is this:  no matter how sickening your adulthood may be at any given moment, there will be another March 1 and you will find another cherry on top of your Shamrock Shake.  Hold on for that day.  It will come soon.