My Son is a Genius

Without a doubt, we are each our children's biggest fans.  From the moment little Fred is born, we are convinced that he is the most brilliant, accomplished, and overall naturally gifted child in the universe.  "Freddy took his first steps today!"  "Awww, Fred said 'Mommy' this morning.  In French."  And, of course, "I was approached today by Steven Spielberg who says that Fred has the most natural talent for acting that he has ever in his lifetime seen."

The unfortunate part is these...we'll call them "beliefs" because "delusions" is harsh...are very real.  We are 100% convinced that our kid has a special gift that will make him or her fabulously famous, wealthy and, by extension, happy.  And most of the time we are right to believe that our kid is special--he is!  But it's the direct line to glory and fame that makes us a bit, well, insane.

My point is that my kid is a genius.  Actually, I truly believe he is.  But one particular talent has set me off today.  He is a born artist.  No, really.  He's awesome.  His innate gift recalls the likes of the true "Greats."  Proof is to the left.  This is his very first piece.  I call it "mom finally figured out what I want and I am blissful."  Yesterday I read an article about kids his age like to color with crayons.  I hadn't even considered it, really--generally he eats anything that small.  But I had noticed that he is constantly grabbing for my pens and paper, so I figured I would give it a try.  As I was too lazy to actually hunt down the crayons, I decided a dry erase board would do.  So I pulled out the board, set it on the floor, took the cap off of the pen, and handed it to him.  I wish I could describe the look on his face.  It was of such excitement, I felt guilty that I hadn't thought of this sooner.  He was elated.  He grabbed the pen, flipped it to the wrong side, and began to pound on the board.  Ok, well, his artistic tendencies make him eccentric.  No worries.  I flipped the pen to the right side, and he tried again.  Well, the results you can see for yourself .  Brilliant.  The kid is an artistic savant.  Does anyone disagree (with the understanding, of course, that if you disagree your comment will never be posted)?

All agents out there, please feel free to contact us.  We will be working on his next piece--an interpretive sculpture made of bologna.  Checks can be made to me.  Thanks.