A Wrinkle in the Plan

My female relatives are incredible.  This statement is true in many contexts, but in one particular area, they really stand out to the general public--their skin is gorgeous.  My grandmother is model-beautiful at 150 (she would kill me if I actually said her age).  My mother is stunning.  My aunts glow.  They all look terrific.  And this is a particularly incredible feat considering the fact that half of them spent a lot of time on a farm, sans sunscreen.  But it's true.  Barely a wrinkle in sight.

Because I refuse to do a self-analysis, I will just contend that my skin is ok.  It's relatively normal, I would say, particularly for my age.  Lately, I have seen the deepening of some wrinkles on the forehead, but what do you expect when you are constatly squinting at a toddler, trying to figure out his next move.  But there is one issue that sort of bothers me, and I have no idea why.  I don't have laugh lines.

For those of you who don't watch daytime TV, laugh lines are those little "(" and ")" lines around your mouth.  It is very popular for men and women, alike, to use various forms of toxins to remove these lines.  Most people hate theirs and spend good money to get rid of them.  So why, in the name of Dr. Dre, am I feeling weird about not having any?  Because I wonder whether I have laughed enough.

I know--freakish.  But the thought crossed my mind the other night.  What if I don't have these annoying little wrinkles because I don't smile and laugh enough.  Don't get me wrong--the entirety of my childhood and a good chunk of my adulthood was absolutely blissful.  I think I generally have a good time, even when things are bad.  But I'm wondering if all of this joy/ smiley-simle stuff is just in my head and I walk around glaring at everyone all of the time?  I'm not really sure that I care, if this is the case, because I also dislike people in my head a lot and it really saves time if we just get that out in the open right away.  But what am I teaching my kid??  What if he doesn't think mommy smiles?  What if I raise a kid who thinks it's bad to show happy emotions?  What if he pierces his eyebrow at the age of 3 and asks to be called "Prince Dark"?

I know--I know.  Lay off the vodka.  But when you have very little adult conversation time, these are the things that pop into your head.  Maybe I'll draw the lines in every morning.  Has a makeup company come up with a liner for this yet?  If not, I should pitch it.  I can't be the only Debbie Downer out there.  Heck, the entire East Coast would totally buy the stuff.  I'm all over this idea.  In the meantime, dear readers, know that I am generally trying to smile.  Even if I can't prove it.

And hi Grambo.