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In the movie Lost in Translation there is a scene in which Bill Murray's character explains that, upon having your first child, "your life as you know it is gone...never to return." The movie has been one of my favorites for years. I just wish that I had known he meant my life.

In early 2010, I gave birth to the world's most perfect child. (Is there a parent who doesn't think his/her child is the world's most perfect?) In addition to being beautiful, he is brilliant and sweet and funny and hands-down the best thing that will ever happen to me. This kid is my entire world. I had somehow suspected through most of my life that he would be, which is why I fought very hard to have him. But about the post-childbirth apocalypse, I had absolutely no clue.

To say things have changed would be misleading. EVERYTHING has changed. Most of it has been good--some not so great--but everything is without a doubt different. And now the world changes once again. My little family and I find ourselves journeying from the big city to beautiful, calm Montana. Will the change be for the better? As with anything, the answer is sometimes "yes," sometimes "no," and always sought with massive quantities of hope. Come with me as I navigate the roads from fast-paced, big-city lawyer to Montana Momhood. Is there a line that can be walked? We'll see. But I can guarantee, at a minimum, it will be an adventurous road trip....

Friday, May 20, 2011

Rain, Rain, Go Away...

It has been a very, very rainy season here.  My understanding from the news and the app that I have that tells me the weather at six places I love the most (though not all--did you know it's been in the 60s and sunny in Dublin?) is similarly damp.  Totally awesome for my beloved garden.  Update:  there are tiny sprouts of lettuce and carrots coming up!  But not so great for the morale.  Especially for a one year old.  But like everything else, you figure out things to do, and life goes on.

My point?  Even the storms here are different.  I am pretty sure I have mentioned a few times how much lightening and thunder in Chicago freaked me out.  I was serious when I said I would stand over my baby's crib, arms outstretched, waiting to fend off lightening with my...what?...anti-lightening arms, I guess.  Anyway, they were loud, violent storms, as many of you can attest.  But what I had forgotten is that storms here aren't.  Yes, it has been raining for weeks.  And yes there has been some wind.  But I kid you not--I have had to go check the sandbox cover to see if there are pools on it, in order to determine whether I was making up the nighttime rain.  It's so...quiet.  Like everything else, it's creepy quiet rain.

I don't know why I find this so odd.  Don't get me wrong--there are tornadoes in eastern Montana and brush fires from lightening in the west.  The storms are here.  They just seem more...manageable?  Is that the weather or my state of mind?  Probably both.  Maybe all fears seem a bit more subdued after a whole heckuvalotta fear.  Maybe the less humidity thing makes the weather more mild.  Either way, I'm sure the kid appreciates me leaving him alone.  Either way, I appreciate the storm clouds leaving me alone for a bit.
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