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In the movie Lost in Translation there is a scene in which Bill Murray's character explains that, upon having your first child, "your life as you know it is gone...never to return." The movie has been one of my favorites for years. I just wish that I had known he meant my life.

In early 2010, I gave birth to the world's most perfect child. (Is there a parent who doesn't think his/her child is the world's most perfect?) In addition to being beautiful, he is brilliant and sweet and funny and hands-down the best thing that will ever happen to me. This kid is my entire world. I had somehow suspected through most of my life that he would be, which is why I fought very hard to have him. But about the post-childbirth apocalypse, I had absolutely no clue.

To say things have changed would be misleading. EVERYTHING has changed. Most of it has been good--some not so great--but everything is without a doubt different. And now the world changes once again. My little family and I find ourselves journeying from the big city to beautiful, calm Montana. Will the change be for the better? As with anything, the answer is sometimes "yes," sometimes "no," and always sought with massive quantities of hope. Come with me as I navigate the roads from fast-paced, big-city lawyer to Montana Momhood. Is there a line that can be walked? We'll see. But I can guarantee, at a minimum, it will be an adventurous road trip....

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Routine: friend or foe?

I have alwas been a creature of habit.  Ok, that's putting it nicely.  I'm a bit...extreme.  I LOVE my routines.  For example, upon entering a hotel room in which I will be staying, I promptly put all of my things away.  Everything.  In its place.  I can't go eat first, I can't sleep first--everything must be in its spot.  Ok, that sounds strange now that I put it in writing.  But you get the idea.  I LOVE my routines.

Hangin on Tough to my routine.
With a child, routines become even more necessary.  When he eats, when he sleeps, whether he sleeps, I should say--all of these things necessarily affect daily life.  And when his routine gets messed up, the day gets crazy.  Ask any of my friends--when I am off of his routine, both he and I let the world know it.  The problem is that life (especially my life) doesn't often fit the routine perfectly.  Things come up: meetings, dinners, New Kids on the Block concerts.  All of these activities (ok, not really the last one) have the potential to create upheaval that lasts for days (ok, fine, the last one too).  So I stick to our routine to the very best of my ability.  Sure, it's not always convenient, but the trade-off is that I sleep and he sleeps and we are both relatively pleasant individuals.  It's comfortable and it makes the day work for us.

But the problem, of course, is the total destruction that comes with not following the routine, once it is...well, routine.  Not only does going off of the routine throw me for a loop, it sends me into such a state of panic, I can't function.  If it's a big routine-buster, such as a vacation or work trip or the like, the result is such a huge sense of freak-out, it takes me days to recover.  The end result is missing out on the fun things, and expanding my world even on the not so fun things, that may throw a wrench into my daily life.

So the question is, should I try to create more, smaller changes to the routine so that I may wean myself from its comforts?  Or should I simply give in and never again vary from the constant of daily life so that such chaos is kept at bay?  I ask you, dear readers, for your thoughts on this one.  Are you slaves to your daily life?  Do you vary it at all?  Are you running families and does this affect things?  Are you even out there?  Did you vote today?
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